she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
