and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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