It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
You brought string cheese to the strip club
We're too hungover to prance.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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