i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize