Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
why do cheetos always look like penises
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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