Too much gin, very little bucket
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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