Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
this will be a night to untag.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
