So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Randomize
