At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
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knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
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These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
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