looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
