i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
worst night to have a conscience
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
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