I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
