I puked a lego.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Randomize
