She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
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Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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