i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
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It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
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All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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