ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
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