I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
