No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
