He told me they were just razor bumps!
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize