Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(609): View more from New Jersey

Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.

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(609): Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS. http://tfl.nu/xjwy

Replies (17) Good night (3201) Bad night (565)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll

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(336): Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll http://tfl.nu/6m63

Replies (27) Good night (5696) Bad night (1296)
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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.

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(814): It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice. http://tfl.nu/t4ih

Replies (7) Good night (634) Bad night (4997)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over

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(508): just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over http://tfl.nu/74b2

Replies (29) Good night (21487) Bad night (968)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love

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(732): she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love http://tfl.nu/knwu

Replies (35) Good night (12483) Bad night (1210)
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(214): View more from Texas

If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.

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(214): If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class. http://tfl.nu/5suq

Replies (7) Good night (2694) Bad night (959)
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(502): View more from Kentucky

i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple

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(502): i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple http://tfl.nu/806d

Replies (4) Good night (1707) Bad night (828)
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(614): View more from Ohio

You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.

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(614): You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city. http://tfl.nu/ce0d

Replies (4) Good night (1569) Bad night (632)
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(716): View more from New York

just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night

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(716): just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night http://tfl.nu/yn86

Replies (11) Good night (3841) Bad night (1251)
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(330): View more from Ohio

It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.

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(330): It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop. http://tfl.nu/5ysk

Replies (11) Good night (663) Bad night (1554)
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(815): View more from Illinois

Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..

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(815): Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won.. http://tfl.nu/wk4z

Replies (6) Good night (1417) Bad night (397)
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(414): View more from Wisconsin

I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?

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(414): I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I? http://tfl.nu/qaua

Replies (10) Good night (441) Bad night (744)
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(414): View more from Wisconsin

I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.

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(414): I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night. http://tfl.nu/mhsz

Replies (13) Good night (587) Bad night (1036)
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(719): View more from Colorado

I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.

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(719): I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right. http://tfl.nu/asg0

Replies (8) Good night (1237) Bad night (355)
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(516): View more from New York

I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.

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(516): I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams. http://tfl.nu/a235

Replies (2) Good night (484) Bad night (273)

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