totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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