and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
