their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
