I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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