he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize