Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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