Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
