tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize