True but thats because hes a fetus.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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