Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake đź‘Ś
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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