I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
