I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
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It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Life without a bra equals bliss.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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