Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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