ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
