The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
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