when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize
