he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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