Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Randomize