I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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