john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
