she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
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