They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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