When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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