so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize
