yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.