have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.