Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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