Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
There r osticjed everywhere
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
