This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
