it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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