I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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