so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
